Would I Be Different....?

Sometimes I think about random things. Like why I was chosen to have this sleep disorder and go through all of that, along with having adolescent bipolar. But then again, I wasn't there for most of it. With my bipolar, I would have blackout rage. With my sleep disorder, I was sleeping most of the time. So then it makes me ask, why was my mom chosen to deal with all of this? She was the one who had to go to all of the doctors appointments and worry about me while I just went on my merry little way. I don't think that we would have the same bond if we didn't go through what we did. But was it really necessary? Could we just go back and form this bond without me beating her up and going into a blind rage? I don't know if I would be the same person if I hadn't gone through that. Would I be as strong? Would I be this opinionated? Would I be like everyone else? Would I be this proud to have accomplished this much? What would I be like? Without this sleep disorder, I could have been popular or been into sports. Ok, I know that even if I wasn't sleeping I wouldn't be into sports. Haha. I tried that and didn't like it. But it's interesting to think about.. Maybe I wouldn't have lost all my friends. But would I still want those friends? Would I still want that life? Hmm..

I think my life right now is pretty amazing. So I'll just stick with that right now. I do have days where I hate everything and want to re do my past but at this moment, I'm ok. So I'll stick with that. I'm also thankful to have the relationship that I do with my mom! :)