People Suck.

I'm really not a fan of people. If I'm around somebody too much, they reallyyyyyy annoy me. But the way some people act is just stupid. I was watching Dr. Phil the other day because it was about "Outrageous Teens" or whatever. And let me add that I NEVER watch Dr. Phil. He annoys me. But on this show, there was one girl who was doing a lot of drugs and thought it was normal. She actually said, "Well everybody does that so why is it such a problem?". Let me tell you girl.. Not everybody does it!!. She said that she had been "clean" for 4 months because now she only takes Xanax daily, does cocaine, and smokes pot but only at night. Are you kidding me? You think you're "clean" because that's all you do? That is just crazy.
I am really opinionated if you haven't realized already. But sometimes I just don't get people.. But I haven't been part of the "real world" for a while. Since I slept so long, I really haven't been a functioning person. I go to the store and to babysit and whatever. But I don't really go hang out with people or anything. I'm just not sure how to have a life really.. But with everything that went on the last couple years, people have just ditched me. Even important people I have known my whole life. They just leave you when you need people most. But I think that everybody hates me and will leave me eventually so why even try? I just like to sit in my own sorrow and feel bad for myself. But that's only once in a while. For the last week and a half, my pills aren't kickin it as much. It's been a rough few days.. (So that's why these last couple are so negative.) But I haven't felt this crappy in a while. I knew that this was bound to happen sometime. But I go to my psychiatrist next week so we'll see what she thinks I should do. We will see... but for now I will just sit in my own little depressed world.
Let me tell you a couple things that go on in my "depressed world".
1. I don't move. If I don't have to get up or move, I don't. I will sit there for hours and hours. Even if I'm starving, it takes so much energy for my body to get up that it's not worth it.
2. I sleep a lot. That is how I learned to deal with things. Since it took up most of my life, why not just keep it going? I will take like 3 naps a day when I'm depressed. Why not since I'm not moving anyway, right?
3. I don't talk to anybody.. I can't keep a conversation going and I don't really want to. I don't usually use my phone a lot when this happens.
4. I am on a different level of depression. Most people say that they get depressed but I'm pretty sure it's not this bad. I would actually love to be depressed like normal people. On the bipolar scale it is SUPER low. Because I am bipolar 2 it is not like bipolar 1. #1 has manic and depression. Not me. #2 has mostly depression. My manic is functioning and going to the store just because I want to. Usually I go to the store because I HAVE to and I have to build myself up for either a few days or hours. But nothing is easy. So we'll see how it goes this time.

I'm about to take a nap but I want to post a few P!NK videos first. So anyway, thanks for reading. Hope everybody is doing well.
Also, my blog posts are all over the place. I just have too many thoughts going through my brain at once.