Christmas.

Christmas.... Let's start out with I Love Christmas. It is one of my favorite holidays. I love spending time with my family. My brother was home for 3 weeks. We all hung out and just spent some good time together. We baked a ton of cookies which was a good time. It's a new thing this year for me because I am actually awake and have energy! But I love the spirit of the holiday and the christmas music and the lights and especially my elvis stockings. :)

And another thing.. I hate this holiday. My parents are divorced. Even though they are still friends, we have to have 2 seperate christmases. I wish that we could just all spend the day together like we used to. But everything is changing and I'm not a fan of it. This year, there was a new thing added to christmas: my mom's boyfriend. I think that he is around too much and it really gets on my nerves. But I also LOVE my space and I'm not really a fan of having someone spend THAT much time here! Especially because we live in a little apartment. I know that my mom wants to spend time, but they can go do their own thing. So anyway.. I don't really like change and adding him to christmas was not very exciting. I just like spending time with my family on special holidays. That includes- my mom, my dad, my brother, and my gma and gpa. Also, my brother leaves on christmas too because he goes to see his girlfriend and her family. I'm fine with that but it's just different. We do get to have our traditions in the morning. But it's all changing and I don't want it to. I slept through some of it and I want that time back. But I'll never get it..
Another reason why I hate christmas coming around is because my best friend died 5 minutes after christmas. Yep. December 26th, 2007. After all this stupid sleep crap and bipolar stuff I had to go through.. Everybody moved on with their life and ignored me. But even through all of that, she was still my friend. She accepted me for who I was. She was the only one that stayed around. And then...... she got cancer. I don't know why it had to be her.. She was amazing. She was so kind, so positive and just a great person. I know that sometimes when people die, people only focus on the good things and make them sound like the perfect person that never did anything crappy. But Chelsey was really like that. She was awesome. She was my best friend since pre school. And she died. I cannot believe it's been 3 years already.. It's still hard to this day. I don't know why we would lose somebody this great and this important. I think about her everybody. The hardest thing is that sometimes I want to call her up and see if she wants to hang out.. but then I realize that I will never get to talk to her again. She's gone. I miss her everyday and wish that she was here. But there's nothing I can do about that I guess.. It just sucks..